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Have you ever thought about the difference between having and being? I have and I believe that it is an amazing realization. Do you ever wonder if you are really here, if you are really experiencing your life and this world, the sensations of everything that is around you?! You may say yes and really believe that and you may say yes and truly you are an enlightened being who is just being, but for most of us humans we are more concerned with having than being. We are struggling, fighting to just survive, to eek out what we can manage from this life of push and shove, of haves and have not’s. Our lives are built on hard work to pay bills accumulated for a myriad of reasons we can’t even remember. We are sad, depressed, angry, and always searching for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. I know I am painting a bleak picture here, but it is to emphasize how hard we work to have and how many of us fail at having in so many ways.

So many people are searching for ways to feel better, live better, think better, be better, but again isn’t that just another form of having? So we work really hard at our job to pay our bills and then we play really hard so we feel better about how hard we work. We look for ways to calm ourselves, expand our consciousness, better ourselves, or just forget. We grow further apart, but sometimes can come closer together. Face it most of us are all over the place just trying anything and everything to figure out how we can fit in and just make it to tomorrow. The struggles are real for all of us, even if you think some else has it better than you, they probably think the same of you.

My epiphanies come in strange ways, but this one came as a powerful storm that almost tore my entire being apart! I had recently heard the poem “The Invitation” by Oriah and was amazed at how deeply it struck at my heart, not because I was in a relationship where I thought this is perfect for this situation, but because it felt like something that I should say to myself and truly mean it – and that while I spoke the words I could forgive myself for not “having” everything that I thought I would at this point in my life. The poem and all of the other things I was doing at the time to center myself and make sense of what I was searching for made me realize that we have the right to just “be.” That with just being all of the things that we strive to have will come or not and it won’t matter.

Soon after this realization another one came to me and that was that all of my expectations for my life had also included expectations of other people and expectations of their lives to make my life better or the way I thought my life should be turning out. I thought about how much importance I had placed on education and jobs in my marriage and how in the end those things only made us grow apart and I wondered what might have happened if the relationship had been allowed to just be, would the outcome have been different, maybe, however I don’t live my life in what if’s and past sadness so I didn’t linger there, but for the future I will take that into consideration, because it definitely feels better to just let people be who they are without my judgment’s or expectations. And isn’t that how we want to be treated too?

My wish for this world and all those who live in it is that we can all just be. I mean that in whatever way it works for you, for me just being is the calmest state of existence and there is no having involved at all.

Remember Every Day is Beautiful

Blessings to you all,

Syndi

“Sometimes our lives let us see where we would like to be again so that we can ask the questions – how can I incorporate this joy in my life now, what would the possibilities be if I opened myself up to a change – lamenting over the past never serves us, but asking questions and developing the answers for positive use of old loves for new ideas and experiences will always serve us for the better.”  This is something I said to a dear friend who was feeling challenged over remembering things that she did in the past that she had loved so dearly and how her path had led her away from those things.

Sitting in our silence reminiscing over past loves of hobbies and even lovers when we were younger and in a different space can be so beautiful and even inspiring. We may decide to take up that guitar and start playing again or take up the brush and start painting again, go out and ride horses, just open our hearts and spirit to the beauty and joy that surrounds us in so many ways. Be a kid again as an adult this time the experience can be grounding yet uplifting! Why not? What is really holding you back? Yes, you are holding you back, the excuses will ooze out of us for reasons not to experience this happiness and then what happens? We lament with sadness over the loss that we feel we can never recover.

The unhealthy aspect of the past haunting us is the lamenting without moving forward and doing something to lift ourselves from the circle of chasing our lost dreams or dreaming of the what ifs. Our intentions for every moment of our life are of the utmost importance and where and how we focus those intentions can lead us to an open heart or a closed heart. This is important to recognize and most people will just brush it off, they will see that they must make an effort to move forward, to move past those things that hold them back. But you have to do it with the loudest voice you can muster – YELL it out!!! “I AM WORTH MORE THAN MY EXCUSES!!!” Say yes to your adventure, whether it was a hobby that you loved when you were young or something new! Say yes to YOU!!! You deserve every happiness that you can give yourself! We are the only ones holding ourselves back, for every excuse you can come up with a solution can be found!

Don’t believe me, well I am a prime example of a lamenting over the past human being and I lived in circles and sadness for years. I worked hard on forgiving myself and seeking what it means to be me so that I could brake those chains and I know you can too! My spirit soars with intentions of joy, peace, and prosperity and as much fun as I can fit in – haha! Yes, sometimes that means remembering something from the past and thinking oh I wish I hadn’t given that up. So then I decide is it something that I want to bring back into my life and will it fit for my highest good and the intentions I have set for moving forward and if so then great its in and if not then I think of it fondly without pain or sadness and move on. Trust me this may not happen overnight, but it can happen and with time it gets easier. I spent a good part of my life looking and searching for what the key to happiness was and I believe I have found it, I am just me, living and loving life, just being and expanding my consciousness as far as it can reach. Tomorrow this view may change, but for now it works for me.

What is your key to happiness? Want to find it? If my story hits home with you then let’s work together on transitioning you to a place where you are living the happiest life ever!!!

Remember Every Day is Beautiful!

Blessings to you all,

Syndi

Let’s talk about transition. Makes sense right? I am a Transitional Life Coach. Working with people in transition and personally going through transitions in my life, even as recently as this year, I have learned that we do not just transition through life events externally, but we can also go through internal transition. Whether the transition is external or internal we can choose to move forward through the process and deal with what it brings or we can choose to halt the process and live with the repercussions.

Many people believe that transition is just a phase they go through to get from point to another; from one job to another, from one home to another, from one school to another, from one place or person to another, from ill health to wellness, from grief to happiness, and so on down the road. But, I believe there is more, much more. First, making the choice to move from one point to another is huge; it calls on us to be brave, to be open to change, and to see the possibilities. This experience can make or break a person, if we cannot manage how we will move through the process with grace and ease we could do actual harm to ourselves and the need to recover from the experience can be lengthy.

With internal transition, at least as I have experienced it, it is what we decide to change within ourselves to make us a happier more centered and creative person. This work can begin at any time and can take as long as the person wants to do the work. I believe this because I have seen and experienced it – I have seen miserable people completely change their way of thinking and being and go from angry everyday to smiling and joyful. I have experienced life changing transition myself from feeling worthless to feeling empowered.

If a person is working on living a happier life by working on positive internal transition when they go through major external transition, moving forward through the external transition is easier. This does not mean that there will not be times when they are sad or stressed, but they will be able to pull themselves out of it much quicker. Even I have times when I go back to my comfort zone of feeling unworthy and unsafe, but part of the work I did during my internal transition was to develop skills so I could get back on track right away. 

We have choices; we can go through external transition without ever working on internal transition, or we can be working on our internal transition making external transitions easier to handle when they arise, or we can do nothing, be fearful and never move forward internally or externally. I have chosen to continue to work on my internal transition. I would love to hear what you would choose.

Here are some tips for internal transition work:

1. Meditate Daily – it only takes 5-15minutes
2. Journal – write down ways you might create internal transition and how that would benefit you
3. Find groups or classes of like minded people – yoga, art, reading, etc.
4. Spend time seeking your dreams – write them down, is there one you can work on now?
5. Develop your support system – do you have people in your life who help or hinder you?
6. Get a Transitional Life Coach

Remember Every Day is Beautiful!

Blessings to you all,

Syndi

Intentions vs. Resolutions

Ok, so here we are three months into the year and I was wondering about how people who choose to make resolutions every new year are doing? A resolution is a firm decision to do or not do something, according to the dictionary. Are you fulfilling your promise to yourself to eat healthier, lose some weight, or just get unstuck from those things that are holding you back from being your phenomenal self?

Personally, I do not make resolutions, I never have. There is something that always felt negative, to me, about resolutions. Its like if you don’t fulfill your resolution then you are a lesser person, or you couldn’t hack it. Let’s face it the first time you make an excuse to yourself that its ok to break the resolution even a little bit – you are lying to yourself and that sticks to your soul!

So what can you do when you want to work in a positive direction on something in your life? You can set an intention! According to the dictionary an intention is something that you plan. It just sounds kinder than a resolution, but what is kind about it is that you plan.

Planning should be a key point in any type of change we decide to make in our lives. When we make a change without considering how that change will effect us, our family, and our lives then we fall into rushed decision making, indecisiveness, guilt, regret, a whole gambit of negative energy.

The great thing is that if a plan is not working out then you can change it – you have a chance to re-evaluate the intention to see if it still fits your needs, if changes to the plan need to be made, or if it has become obsolete. There is no regret or guilt with changing a plan, it just is a change. The energy can still be positive.

I am all about positive energy in my life, I have decided that there is no room for regret, guilt, and feeling bad about the decisions I make. This has taken me a long time and a lot of soul searching to finally realize and it is so powerful! So to be on this path I choose to set intentions, to make plans for changes, be they small or big. Because even the smallest intention can have an effect on your life and I want it to be good!

Remember Every Day is Beautiful!

Blessings to you all,

Syndi